People often ask me about how I've been able to manage work and home without much hassles with 2 boys around?! Until recently, I used to think that this whole stuff they talk abt managing two boys is a much hyped up non- issue. But slowly, it has started to sink in.Now the sitution some of the time atleast makes me move into ' I couldn't agree more agree more to it ' lines.
Especially after my chetts and family came for vacation(they have two girls), I am forced to accept the theory or fact that, bringing up boys is a different ball game altogether. Girls(at this age atleast) , I think listen and think more. With boys ,the acting comes first and thinking comes later at leisure time, if you have the patience to explain it to them then.Or is just with my boys?!!! I wonder.
Boys resort to fighting physically at the drop of a hat. With Achu, pushing /pulling/beating/pinching Mommo is like second nature. I think girls cry more than boys do, but my lil ones offer competition in that arena too, they can beat any girl in wailing/crying non-stop.
On days when I feel esp bad for scolding them or punishing Achu, I feel miserable and take resolutions on how I would behave from that day onwards. But once back home, resolutiosn fly out of the window, mostly in the first 10 mts - latest within the first 30mts itself.I must admit that this must have something to do with the long hours at work as well, cannot deny that. But the credit due to the boys- they must get that, rite ;)
I dont know why both of them need the same thing at the same point in time and have not qualms abt laying hands on each other to get possession.We made it a point to point to buy anything and everything in twos so that such fights dont occur.But then for certain toys, you just cannot buy two of them like the mini toy car- how can you have two ofthe kind in one home. I think you should not have it at all, if you cannot have two of a kind!!! And guess what, it doesnt stop there, even if you buy two of anything. Theres a competition on to dismantle anything that they can get hold of and its a matter of an hour or two, before the parts are seen lying all over the place. Once this is achieved, both of them would want the better toy all to themselves!!!And the latest trend in this industry is that they mostly want only the thing that the other one is playing with currently and not anythingelse!!!And Achulde, who is quite popular in the class for his penchant for prophesing the joys of sharing with his Kuttaaaar( kuttukaar for friends),is no role model when at home. He is the one who needs anything and everything that Mommolde is playing with. Mommolde on the other hand lets go most of the time (in comparison), but if its something, then he must have, then theres no stopping him either.And mind you, you can't take sides, you need to be impartial- but in my case, one of them is still a baby and not a boy yet, so Achulde gets the advantage most of the times., when the two take in each other.And the moment, I take Mommolde's side, this fellow throws tantrums!!! I'm just waiting for the time, they can take on each other as equals. I'll atleast be spared from taking sides then!!
Another thing I noticed is that the boys speak louder than girls and if you have to make yourself heard, your volume needs to be even higher. Then as the TV would be playing in the background atleast 16/7, your voice needs to be on a higher decibel than the boys and the tv's!!! And I think boys are fuzzy eaters as well. My boys had not had much of an issue in terms of being very selective on food, but post the cousins' visit they've been introduced to the worldly vices of maggi and black juice-'pepsi'. And of course ice creams!!!
All said and done, I realise how much of a challenging task this is. To bring them up well, without any partiality or prejudice and giving them no reason to complain, being there for them, not letting them down - thus paving the way to bring them up as confident , responsible caring and compassionate individuals- thats the bare minimum that we as parents should be able to do for them.(Touchwood, I hope they turn out so!!!)